Back to writing after 1.5 years..! Bruised, but still kicking it.

 

pexels-photo-53754

That look-up, when in realization or utter confusion!

 

My last post was on Jan 2015 when I posted about the blues of being an entrepreneur and how not to suck being one! I had just started up my event management company and boy, did I have a story to tell.. 😀

1.5 years and 3 businesses later, I guess I’m more of an entrepreneur now and less of a writer. So I’m back with a vow to do so, more. Here are some crazy , weird observations/rants/understandings/life lessons/introspections that I’ve learned over this period.

  • Life is a bitch. Suck it up, keep going!

There were countless times I wanted to lock myself up and cry thinking of all the problems that kept popping up every so often and to which I couldn’t find a possible solution to. Yes, I thought of quitting, running away, taking up a daily job, driving Uber, freelancing or even going back to school. Things were more down than up. Optimism could only mask the issues temporarily and they were back, even more relentless, bigger.

But I understood the world simply doesn’t give two hoots about your worries or sadness and it keeps rotating. Unendingly.. And it’s then when I realized that no one preferred to listen to your whining, no matter how genuine your reasons were. This was the greatest realization (for mankind) I feel, after Archimedes’ one in the bath tub. And personally, I’m much more emotionally stable and contained than I ever was, and amazingly have become more adept at analyzing situations.

  • Your family is your foundation. Not your backup!

I have no shame in admitting that I always thought that I could fall back onto my family if things got worse . Getting into entrepreneurship, this was my backup plan. If shit happened, poof… back into the safe zone of the family. But gradually I started understanding the true value of family and that I had no right to shove my risks and troubles into my family, expecting them to come save the day. (Note : Till date neither did my family ever even hint about this nor will they ever , since they are epic!). I came to understand that I had to cut out my own path in this world and do so with my head and heart intact. This leads me to my third revelation which is…

  • … I’m slowly turning into an ‘Adult’!

Boy, was this a mighty revelation at all. Being the official family comedian and happy-go-lucky guy, I scoffed at anyone who asked me to be mature. I really did not agree with the viewpoint of being serious or thoughtful to be pre-requisite for being an adult. It was all in the right decisions and being a responsible funny guy , preached I. Nope.

I started thinking of life, career, future, savings and milestones in life. I couldn’t envision these things through any funny angle how much ever I tried. Life was molding me in its cogs to be an adult I realized. I no longer believed in partying until dropping dead, spending sleepless nights binge-watching movies, nor fill carts after carts through addictive online shopping (all of which I would have sworn by, didn’t make me any less an adult!). I started wearing formal ironed shirts for meetings, maintaining to-do lists, calendar markings,  and what not. Hell, I even started marking my emails with color tags in Gmail! I realized slowly but surely that being an adult isn’t about being any less funny or more serious ; it was simply about priorities and choices.

  • You need friends. You are no Superman!

If I stressed earlier about family , I can’t stress enough of having friends. Not the kind where there are thousands of them on your Facebook or Instagram, but you have no clue of who the person is. Rather those friends with whom you could hang out when you are happy/sad/angry/bitchy/nagging/high/elated/pissed or just basically any emotion on the human emotion spectrum, and still be yourself. It surely again doesn’t mean that you can be all emo and dependent on them (Refer point 1), but it helps give you perspectives that you can’t see. Luckily I have a few of them and I’m ever so grateful for them! I could kiss them outta love ! 😉

  • Failure is ok. Laziness/Procrastination not so!

I will accept once and for all, I’m born lazy. To put things in perspective, if there was a prize of million bucks and all I had to do was to just walk a kilometre for it, I would happily give that up and then later bluff of how charitable I was. I always procrastinated and thought light of the “gone time… blah blah blah.. time and tide.. blah blah” and believed in doing things at my own pace. My explanation (or rather an argument)? ” I should feel to do it. I can’t be forced!” Also, fear of failure/rejection/non-completion of things started etc made it, even more, harder for me.Well, entrepreneurship and life, in general, taught me rather clearly , how much of a naive man I was. I understood the effort mattered more than the achievement.

Proof I am improving? Heck, I’m blogging again after 1.5 years , am I not?! 😀

Well, I’ve got so much more to tell, but this is the gist of it all. Am I successful yet? Nope. Have I planned it all down to the last bit? Am I all serious and mature? Not at all. I hardly have any savings yet. But I’m learning, and with an open mind I keep finding new things in life, and I find inherently all of it a challenge. And I’m thankful for all that I have gone through in life. Cos’ as some old wise man said – It was those very paths that lead me to be who I am now!

Oh yeah!!

(drops mic)….. 😀

Advertisements

Open Letter to Soon-to-be-ex-girlfriend ! From, an enlightened boyfriend.

Dear Ex,

It’s with great pain, but a higher sense of contentment that I write you this letter. I understand that as time went on , our relationship traversed the crest and troughs, and what started off as sweet wine, but sadly is now a bitter ale. I have made lots of errors and stupid mistakes that the ‘y’ chromosome in my genetic structure, inherently breeds in my gender, and I assert that am in no way a perfect man. However having said that, this letter would be a dichotomy of the fantasy world and illusions that you thought made a perfect relationship and the reality served cold in a platter. Kindly read on. I assure you are in for a surprise.

Mentioned below are a list of things that paved way for reaching this crossroads in life. Do read , so that maybe, and just maybe, the next guy who stumbles across you, doesn’t flounder in the vast ocean of mystique and unanswerable questions you are.

1. The ‘V’ shape

I’m sorry to be mentioning this first but, unfortunately because of you, I now hate this letter of the alphabet to the core. You were so obsessed with getting me into the V shape so much, that you forgot the fact that there are people out there who consider me as a ball of fun. (pun not intended) And yes, being chubby (definitely not obese or  morbidly obese either), never defined me as a person I was. I take myself as a cloud ball , who passes from places to places making people laugh, giving them a happy feeling of themself and just generally making happy, jovial moments in life. Unfortunately, in our case, except in the initial budding months, I was unsuccessful. But then, seeing hugh jackman and jason statham flaunt their “V” ,you pushed, pulled , nagged , shouted, cried, shushed and blackmailed me denying you-know-what. That was the last straw.

Now hear this. I wont have a ‘V’ ever.  I hate the ‘V’. Period. Or for that reason I hate Y, O and U too !

2. ‘Enjoying life’ dilemma

You always claimed to be in the moment and have fun and rock on the night and what not. But pssst… Here’s a thing. Boozing, getting high and dancing away the night to glory comes ,yes could be put under fun, but not under the actual “moment” thing. Because at the end of the day , when lying bedridden and almost senile, its not the amount of times you epically puked after a drinking session that you would particularly be having a fond memory of. Rather it would be those sights, sensations, memories of the people, first love (definitely not in our case , yea? ), marriage, kids, and those insanely simple yet so rich in human feelings moments that are gonna endear. Both for you and the people involved. So yes, the next time you are throwing up ; remember, even the puke doesnt “want the moment” and is getting out of you to some drain or sewer much better than where it is.

Now you know.

3. Possessiveness

So now we come to the most delicate topic of them all. Yes, I was, I am and I will be possessive. After all, being a ‘Y’ chromosome innate,  entitles me to be atleast possessive about the one thing that I can call as my own discovery, other than those other people I was born to. It did not most certainly mean, that you were to sit inside a room 24×7 and worship me as your “Lord and Master” (reference intended for Shail @ Shail’s Nest :P). Rather it meant that at the end of the day, anything and everything you did, or want to do would go through my ears and head . I know it sounds sexist and all those feminist naysayers are gonna be clamouring for my blood. But again I assert the same , because I like to know what problem might happen in sharing stuffs that happen to you, because there is only two outcomes, “Yes ,go for it.” or “No, dont.”

You know why we would say that authenthically? Of all the homo sapiens in the world we  males, are endowed with so much idiocy and testosterone driven false bravery , that either we would have already “been there, done that”, or we have seen an asshole who was there and is there no more! Period.

4.Religion and Culture

This is funny to the core. Assuming that we followed a dual religion respecting system at home in our inter caste nuclear family, and bringing up our kids according to one religion, either due to adjustment or due to dominance,and if they go astray and turn into criminals, would you at the end of the day want them as Christian criminals or Hindu criminals? Because as far as I see it, it isn’t there religion instilling in them the essence of humanity , rather it would be us, as parents teaching them from right and wrong. All religion and culture would do , is lend them a garb of morality and asinine views of myths and so called “divine laws” , imparting a personality and address as to their family line and other society driven needs.

So , whether it was pooja or the holy mass, ultimately it would have been us who decided our childrens future personality based on what kind of humans we are. But I guess, now it was for the best, lest they see us bickering and fighting all  time due to the aforementioned reasons, while at the same time claiming to be close the upper echelons of divine solitude in our respective religions.

There is a lot more that was there as you would know, as the official record keeper of all the words that has come from our mouth and all the actions that came from us. But neither is there a reason to expound on them, nor criticise. But let me give you a last piece of advice as you sail off to new waters and newer horizons. What defines a person as that particular person, is their characteristics, eccentricities, inadequacies, negativities, flair, speech , smell and what not. Having to compromise and adjust would be ok. But having to completely change and become a new person with a different set of qualities might go to another extreme.

Maybe along with other qualities, a ‘Psycho’, might be bred. Just putting it out there. Because you don’t deserve to die for something you lack in your head or heart,  do you?

Or do you?